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Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Theatre is life. Cinema is art. Television is furniture. ~Anon

Complete lack of Scobi Wan yesterday. I suspect he's hiding out in his new department.

Finally managed to pick up some new windscreen wipers for the car yesterday. 25 Quid??!! How Much ?? It's only two windscreen wipers! I swear the last time I bought any they were about £11. What is going on in the world ? In danger of turning into my dad/grand father etc. here. I have to remember that growth continues (and in theory will always continue) in an upward direction which is part of the reason you can't get penny chews anymore. Well, that and the fact that Woolworth's has gone bust and such sweets only seem to be sold by the pound now-a-days. Still, it was a bit of a shock. (visual: "Shakes head in despair while staring at the floor" mutters in exasperated tone while sighing: "Twenty five quid, sheeesh")

A relaxing evening in front of the telly brings me to the subject of the peak time televisual experience in the UK. Let's be honest, it's a bit of a mess.

"Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover. ~Homer Simpson" He says it like it is.

There are pinpoints of light that shine through the schedules and provide what it says on the tin (ed. Philips ??) ie: Informative and entertaining programming, but they are few and far between. Generally I don't watch a great deal of TV, it tends to be BBC News 24 (I'm my mother's son, she being a newshound), Sky News or some useful documentary, but I do like a decent comedy or drama or a comedy/drama. Of course Movies are a passion, so that's what gets the most of my eyeballs, probably.

So what have we got? The One Show on BBC 1. Adrian Chiles is to leave 'The One Show'. That's a relief. If ever there was a man who embodies the phrase "Housewives favourite" it is he. Personally I won't miss him. The show itself though is proper "car-crash TV". You really don't want to watch, but it's difficult to look away - you're inner curiosity outweighs your ability to change the channel. It has some of the most incredible gear changes ever witnessed on television. They'll start with something light hearted - like "It's pancake day! and today we're making pancakes" and then switch to "The terrible plight of the starving children in earthquake hit Haiti" and then switch to "The number of guile-mots in the outer Hebrides" and wind it up with one of Giles Brandrith's mini history lessons on something like "Holst's - The Planets". It's a whirlwind of a show that leaves you wondering "What the hell just happened?". Very odd.

Coronation Street is the only soap that I'll allow myself to watch - which is handy because Mrs G likes it too. It's the only one that has laughs in it. The others try, but consistently fail and Eastenders (or "The Eastenders" as Gordon Brown refers to it) is just wall-to-wall shouting at each other - which simply isn't entertaining. Last night's two episode's of "Corrie" didn't have as many laughs as usual but it did have a very expensive looking car crash caused by Kevin not fixing Tyrone's brakes. Tyrone had been to a country pub with his wife, Molly (who's carrying Kevin's baby unbeknown to Tyrone) so all good drama as long as you don't take it seriously. If you're interested (and you're probably not) the pub featured in last nights Corrie was the Chapel House Inn which gets a rubbish review here, but looked very nice on the telly.

Then there's The Gadget Show on Channel 5. I really like this - unsurprising really as I'm such a geek, and the bit I caught last night featured the inevitable iPad review. It also has the gorgeous Suzi Perry - which is reason enough to watch it.

Now, 9pm - which in my book is proper peak time telly had the following on the main channels. BBC1: New Tricks (Old age pensioners fighting crime - it's actually a vehicle for some of our best loved old actors to be seen on prime time). BBC2: Out of the frying pan (Two blokes running dinner parties for so called celebrities). ITV1: Jo Lumley up the Nile (nuff said). Channel 4: Blitz street (Tony Robinson blows up a 1940's style street of houses in the name of history? a bit interesting actually and I did watch 15 minutes or so) and finally Channel5: Flash forward (American TV drama over a bazzillion episodes, so if you've missed a couple you've had it.) Is that the best terrestrial TV has to offer ?? Tosh. Early night it is then.

Not looking forward to Thursday - starting to feel uncomfortable already.

Daughter off to Thorpe Park in the sunshine with her mates today. When she's not learning to be a police-person, she and a bunch of other girls work in a local hostelry (well a carvery actually) which is being refitted. This means they're effectively all on holiday, so they're off to try and scare themselves stupid and get wet in the process. Can't blame them - it's a beautiful day for it.

Finally - this morning's news..... Volcano Flight Chaos still. I hear the Icelandic banks final wishes were to have their ashes spread across europe. :-) Banking reform!! Fix the old Casino banking system. Start Lending money, Bank Directors responsible for banks - not government, Regional Stock Exchanges, Get rid of Goldman Sachs as Government advisors - That's an interesting bunch of ideas - I like them..... It's no use, it looks like I'm becoming a Liberal Democrat. I agree with Nick.... and Vince! D'oh!
 

Where is Golfyball?

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